Navy Red Vs Blue Funny Sailors

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PROTECT ME, CONE!

Virtually every episode of Red vs. Bluish has a Crowning Moment of Funny. These are the best ones. Warning: Each folder will comprise unmarked spoilers for the previous seasons.


    open/close all folders

  • The Claret Gulch Chronicles
  • The Recollection
  • The Projection Freelancer Saga
  • The Chorus Trilogy
  • Season 14
  • The Shisno Trilogy
  • Zero

    Mini Series

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"I have no idea what I'm doing."

Out of Mind

  • Delta is analytical, merely proves to be quite human being with his snark.

    Tactical matrix is incalculable, outcome is uncertain, risk of success is unknown... but a little payback would be nice.
    (in response to "Just 1 of the things that makes us human") Excellent point, York. I was non looking at information technology from a flawed perspective. I volition try to do and so in the time to come.
    Oh, then information technology is pride. I was registering an emotion, only I incorrectly categorized information technology as stupidity.

  • The final conversation between Tex and Wyoming in the miniseries:

    Tex: You know what? You lot don't have to tell me. All I accept to do is pummel yous senseless, rip off your helmet, and access your communication logs. I'll know exactly where he is.
    Wyoming: Uh, hm. I see. Well in that case, perhaps I shall tell you.
    Tex: Nah, I like my way meliorate. [bashes Wyoming's head]

Recovery I

  • Once Wyoming reveals himself by firing at Wash:
  • In a Blackness One-act case, Wash'due south No Sympathy towards his fellow Freelancers when the Advisor mentions how many of the other agents resent him for his mental breakdown having shuttered any plans of future A.I. implantation.

    Counselor: Nosotros take safeguards for the unstable emotional patterns of an artificial intelligence. Sometimes these algorithms... fail.
    Washington: Oh, so it's your fault.
    Advisor: Nosotros prefer to think that information technology is no one'south mistake.
    Washington: Actually.
    Counselor: Just a possible, but rare, unfortunate issue.
    Washington: (drily) How user-friendly.

Relocated

  • Sarge, wanting to get their new base of operations in Valhalla up and running, sends Grif up to the very top of the structure. Somewhen, Grif finds that some wreckage is blocking something, and Simmons suggests using a grenade to clear information technology.

    Grif: Is that prophylactic?
    Simmons: None of this is condom! You wanna start analyzing now?!

    • Earlier, Sarge sends Simmons to spy on Bluish Base, where Simmons has an encounter with Caboose. He returns to report...

      Simmons: Well, [the base] isn't running on encephalon power, I can tell yous that.
      Sarge: Oh, adept! That means Grif can still be used as a reliable fuel source!

  • Both Caboose and Grif believing electricity to be "invisible magic." (Although information technology'due south probable the latter was being sarcastic.)

Reach

  • In "Episode 3: At that place Goes the Neighborhood" Sarge and Grif finally make it to the Reach version of Blood Gulch after beingness stranded across the map and getting stuck in Firefight Way, respectively. There, Simmons reveals that he'due south had to defend Ruby Base from the Blues, and in the background the Blue Squad is attacking each other.

    Sarge: Simmons, why are they shooting at each other?
    Simmons: Oh, I told them that if they didn't attack us, I would trade them my pre-order lawmaking for the exclusive chest piece. Now they're fighting each other to meet who gets it.
    Caboose: Marco!
    Grif: Only you already used your lawmaking. You're wearing it!
    Simmons: Yep, but they don't know that.

  • In that same episode, Sarge starts singing while wandering around Forge World. All the times Matt sung it live are besides noteworthy (in the beginning, he forgot the lyrics; in the second, he's forced to exercise it again considering the song is short; and in the third, just for Matt performing in a suit!).

MIA

  • When Grif is apparently kidnapped, Sarge calls Control, and Vic forwards him to Dr.. Sarge wants Doctor to fill in for the missing Grif, but runs into a problem.

    Sarge: Don't tell me y'all're still 1 of those lame paci-whatevers.
    Doc: invoked Pacifists. Yeah, Sarge, I withal am. You don't just turn information technology off when it'south convenient. Information technology'southward not like being a vegan.

  • Church tried to get Caboose to re-stack all of the crates in the storage room of Bluish Base by advising him to treat it "just like Tetris." However, it didn't work since Caboose got confused when the crates didn't disappear whenever he made a full row.
  • Church's Adorkable Squeeing when he gets an annoyed Tucker to comment on how It'due south Serenity… Also Tranquility.

Where There's a Will, There's a Wall

  • Sarge wants to have downwardly the wall behind Red Base to see what'southward on the other side. His start idea? Ship a Warthog (Driven by Grif) down a ramp to smash through it. Lopez'southward Hispanic deadpan commentary simply drives the sense of humour home.
    • Meanwhile, the Blues accept gotten a Pelican chopper. Each Blue soldier has an Imagine Spot:
      • Church building wants to pull a Screw This, I'm Outta Here!.
      • Tucker wants to pick up chicks.
      • And Caboose? His idea balloon just has a floating wreckage of what the Pelican used to be. Thought!Caboose looks downward at Real!Caboose and says, "I have no idea what I'm doing."
    • At the end of the miniseries, Lopez has his own Imagine Spot: He'southward in the Blueish Team'southward tank, and uses it to kill both the Reds and Blues in 1 shot.
  • When Tucker's complaining to Church about being left out;

    Tucker: ...I never get annihilation around hither. You got your sniper burglarize, Caboose got to bulldoze the tank, and the Reds have their jeep!
    (Cut to Grif driving the Warthog down the ramp, screaming as it crashes and explodes)
    Grif: ...Ow.
    Simmons: Well, looks like that plan failed completely.
    Sarge: Simmons! Don't be and then quick to judge! Grif, are y'all alive in there?
    Grif: Yes! Barely...
    Sarge: Aw, damn it. Total failure!

Grifball

  • The Commissioner is hilarious, due to his smug vox and how swiftly he diverts any criticisms towards his management manner.
  • In "Expansion", Team Slipspace discuss the Commissioner's upcoming proclamation;

    Flynt: Maybe they're going to turn off the exploding balls.
    Passenger vehicle: That would salve on our healthcare premiums...
    Rookie: (Worried) The assurance explode?
    Flynt: Aye, but only when we score.
    Rookie: (Relieve) Oh...no chance of that.

    • The banner when we cut dorsum to Commissioner'southward press conference reads, "Commissioner still likes his exploding balls"
  • "The Franchise Player" features a player, "Extermination" Tater, whose constantly in jail for excessive violence, but is paid more half the Grifball League's payroll. Naturally, he gets put onto Team Slipspace. Of course, due to legal reasons, he'due south not allowed outside of a tiny cage. And due to his contract stipulations, only Potato is immune to score. How does Squad Slipspace deal with this? They give him the Grifball, shove his cage to the goal so he score...and get out him there. And we all know what happens when y'all score in Grifball...

    Rookie: Yeah, I figure his contract has him in that jail cell for the rest of his life. Actually doing him a favor, y'know? Shortening that term.
    Potato: (Doing a victory dance) Are yous ready for me, pro leagues? 'Cause I'm about to blow up (Grifball explodes)

Family Shatters

  • One of the reasons for getting a pet: "Someone to blame property damage on".
  • "I vote true cat. They take knives for hands."
  • "Excuse me? I fed and watered my weapon every mean solar day this week!"
  • Axel's habit to dad jokes is treated as Serious Business organisation. Including by himself, who does a Smoke Out after one, and goes on a "rampage" of sorts. West fifty-fifty says lethal forcefulness should be authorized against him before it gets contagious.

    Can a bird do a pun? No, but toucan!

  • "Walk and Talk" sucessfully recreates the evidence'southward absurd conversations, especially when Zero and Phase realize they are aimlessly walking.
  • "Beach Episode" has plenty of Leaning on the Fourth Wall commentary, culminating in the budget running out, "animation" by dragging static renders, and a colour bar in the colors of the RVB logo.
  • "Did you... cutting your hair?" "Seriously?! I'm wearing a helmet!" "No, did you... alter your brand-up?"
  • One showing an old prison cell phone leads Raymond to annotate "That's not a phone, that's a brick with buttons!"
  • "Why can't the English language language be sexy? Like a Snyder movie without slow motion, it own't happening."
  • After all the tall tales about Phase are contrasted with that she's actually doing (cut limbs with scissors = trimming a Bonsai; martial arts = Tai Chi Chuan; reshape mountains = doing a topographic model; beastmaster = playing with a cat), she still kills a subconscious assaulter by throwing her scissors over her shoulder.
  • "The Unbearable Lightness of Zero" has said villain in full Large Ham way, shooting his alert clock note which itself is a pop-up shooting target, his enthusiastic spiel about breakfast (followed by him shouting at Phase for daring to correct him), some wordless overacting trying to clean his sword just by staring at it, and an charmed delivery of a factoid in a meeting. There is also his 'moment of zen' in a bathtub with his sword.
  • Shatter Team fears wasps worse than Grif and Simmons with bats and snakes. Although this ane is no ordinary bug - a highlight is the wasp grabbing 1 in mid-air and throwing her into a wall.
  • "Special Guestmas" has the squad wondering who their special guest is going to be. Fifty-fifty though Lopez, Sarge, and Santa himself prove up. Later on anybody leaves, an animated Gus shows up...to an empty room.

    Gus: Happy federal holiday ever-Howdy? [looks around] Oh goddamnit, I amend nonetheless go paid for this.

  • "Difficult Boiled" has, truthful to the title, a Film Noir sendoff that'southward increasingly cool.
    • Before we even get to the Film Noir, we get-go with W just trying to spotter a movie, but Shatter Squad wants to go out for a late-dark repast.
    • Raymond starts out by flubbing and calling Westward "Dad", much to W's annoyance, as he insists that he's their commanding officer, non father. He then follows up with, "And two, go to bed kids, last time you ate this tardily yous had nightmares."
    • How does East convince West to let the Team get out? "No dishes, and nosotros'll go out you alone." "Take the company card."

    PSAs and Other Videos

  • In an ad for Rally Sport Challenge 2, Sarge attempts to play the game and drive a Warthog at the same time, convinced that "it'southward all most manus-middle coordination". Equally Simmons and Grif continue the pitch, Sarge careens off a colina in the groundwork and crashes, exclaiming, "Oh, my hands and eyes!"
  • The entirety of the "Real Life vs. The Cyberspace" PSA.
    • Coming together new people:

      —Existent LIFE—
      Church: Well, it was, it was actually dandy to run across you!
      Female Donut: It was really keen to meet y'all too!
      Church: Would you mind if I, uh, called you lot later?
      Female person Donut: Sure!
      —Internet—
      Male Donut: So big male child, I'm from-
      Simmons: You're not a daughter!
      Male Donut: What? 'Course I am!
      Simmons: A existent girl?
      Sarge: (from afar) WHO'S A Daughter?! I LIKE GIRLS!!
      Simmons: (to Sarge) Close up, you!
      Male Donut: Yep! I am actually a girl! Tee hee hee!
      Simmons: ...Send me naked pictures!
      Male Donut: ...Okay!
      Sarge: I LOVE ANGELINA JOLIE! DOES ANYONE ELSE LIKE ANGELINA JOLIE?! SHE'S GOT ENORMOUS LIPS!

    • Checking your mail:

      —REAL LIFE—
      Church building: Bills, bills, bills... coupon. Great.
      —Cyberspace—
      Simmons: Pardon me, my friend, just I am Nigirean Roylty, and I demand you to send me coin. Please ignore the fact that I can't spell "Nigerian." Or "royalty."
      Md: Would you lot like to refinance your home? Mortgage rates have never been lower!
      Grif: Hey, Church! We have all the filthiest sluts on the internet. They're hopped upwardly on herbal Viagra and waiting for you!
      Sarge: WOULD YOU LIKE A BIGGER PENIS?! WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE IT? I COULD Advise SOME PLACES!
      Doc: You lot could put information technology in escrow!

    • During the segment on shopping, the "Internet" portion sees Grif demand that Church building give him a Creed CD, and go upset he isn't getting it any faster. This bit also contains Gus Sorola'south (Simmons' voice player) favorite quote of the series:

      Simmons: Creed sucks! I hate you! And I hate the bands you lot like!

    • In the segment on partying with friends, the "Internet" portion has Grif explaining to Church that in that location's no parties online since everyone is too decorated masturbating.
    • Discussing politics:
      • The all-time office of the above exchange is that the domain name "presidentialsluts.com" was actually registered for the longest time to Geoff Ramsey, Grif'due south vocalization actor.
    • Church ends the video by challenge that people can set up for the Internet past "going to your local centre school chess society and paw out crystal meth and guns."
  • In "The Winter Lames: the Olympics Suck":
    • Sarge has several suggestions on how to improve the events, most of which boil down to Stuff Blowing Up.

      Church: Okay, well instead of just criticizing the Games, I call up nosotros should concentrate on helping make the current Olympic events more than fun to watch.
      Sarge: You bet your bobsled. There'due south zero wrong with the Olympics that modern scientific discipline tin't ready.
      Church: Right, similar using aerodynamic computer modeling to develop better ski jumping techniques.
      Sarge: No, like replacing the skis with heat-seeking missiles! And the jumping with exploding.
      Church: Well that sounds a little extreme. How would you amend curling?
      Sarge: Replace the big rocks with grenades.
      Church: Figure skating?
      Sarge: Country mines.
      Church: Downhill skiing?
      Sarge: Light amplification by stimulated emission of radiation gates.
      Church: Speed skating?
      Sarge: Everyone gets a bayonet.
      Church building: Snowboarding?
      Sarge: Get rid of the hippies, and add polar bears! In fact, every issue could use more polar bears!

    • "Tell Michelle Kwan I ever loved her!"
    • Later, Sarge gets the idea to give medals of enriched uranium to the losers.
  • In "Lethargy Crunch":
    • Sarge's insane solution to make more fossil fuel.

      Sarge: [Everyone] knows that gasoline comes from dinosaurs. If we're running out of gas, the solution isn't to drive less, information technology's to kill more dinosaurs!
      Church: All the dinosaurs are already expressionless.
      Sarge: It doesn't have to be just dinosaurs, moron. Whatsoever animate being turns in to oil when information technology dies. So remember: if you wanna exist environmentally friendly, just kill every living affair you meet! And coffin it.
      Simmons: But that process takes millions of years.
      Sarge: I've got fourth dimension.
      (Cutting to Grif buried live, with his arm sticking out)
      Grif: Lemme outta here! There'southward worms!
      Sarge: Gentlemen, we could debate the fine points all day. But the fact remains, a gallon of gas even so costs less today, than a gallon of milk.
      Church: Yeah, only y'all don't drink 3 gallons of milk every time y'all drive to work.
      Sarge: Peradventure you don't!

    • The text on Grif's tombstone reads "Here Lies Grif", with Grif's name crossed out and replaced with "unleaded".
    • Caboose breathes burn subsequently drinking two gallons of gasoline.
  • According to Sarge in Beta Circuitous, a "vital examination of mission critical technology" involves Simmons teabagging Grif repeatedly.

    Simmons: Feels expert...slightly improved!

    Sarge: Grif: how would you charge per unit the humiliation factor?

    Grif: [Dryly] High.

  • One discussion: Grifball. Eventually became an Ascended Meme.
    • The American Grifball League of America
    • This:

      Simmons: At that place are ii teams. 1 red...
      Church: ...and one good.

    • Apparently, when they say the brawl carrier becomes Grif, that'south Non Hyperbole.

      Grif: Hey, what the-? How did I become here? And why am I holding this bomb?

    • Then, when Church explains that the 'brawl' explodes afterwards each score:

      Grif: Yeah, in your face up, not-Grifs! Wait, what was all that stuff near exp- (Bomb explodes) AHHH! OH MY GOD! MY Peel IS ON Burn!

    • Caboose'south clarification of the game.

      Caboose: It's simply like hockey. Except with Grif, and more teeth!

  • The "Game On" PSA. "Tin we finish that fucking horn already!"
  • Everyone was busy during the "Columbus Day" PSA... then they allow Caboose host it. Ballsy Hilarity Ensues.
    • Part of the reason why everyone was decorated? They had to become the Meta under command the way ane handles a loose animal.

      Simmons: Come hither buddy, over here. You lot wanna treat? Who's a good boy? Who'south a expert boy? Come over hither!

  • The "Valentine's Day" PSA. Caboose mourns over celebrating without Church and remembers their "tradition".

    Caboose: Hey Church building! Happy Valentine—
    Church: Get the fuck abroad from me.

  • Outtakes from Reconstruction. Notable moments include "AUTOBOTS, TRANSFORM!" (followed by his absurdly deep "OH MY GOD!"), Scottish!Wash, and the Meta teabagging. Not to mention Church's terrible singing of "I Kissed a Girl."
  • Church attempting to describe Sergeant Johnson's Memetic Badassitude in the final Halo 3: ODST promotional video.

    Church: Sergeant Johnson is equally tough equally they come. They say he'southward a strong equally an ox, and as agile equally... a... smaller ox.
    Sarge: What?
    Church: He moves like a whisper, that you lot only say to the current of air at midnight.
    Simmons: Why would you do that? That doesn't make whatever sense.
    Church building: He'due south as cunning every bit a pull a fast one on, taking a... pottery class at a... Ivy League university... that accepts foxes!
    Grif: Wow. You lot're not very good at analogies, are you?

  • From the Sixth Anniversary PSA:
  • In the DIY preview, the Reds and Blues are given access to the Forge in Halo three. Simmons uses it to make tunnel with a line of Grav-lifts that bladder things towards the end, where Grif is wating. To demonstrate, Simmons sends a giant soccer ball in, which hits Grif in the head;

    Church: So you lot invented a device that fires things are Grif's face up?
    Sarge: This may mayhap be the greatest discovery in the history of mankind!
    Simmons: Information technology has other applications too, sir.
    Sarge: You hateful you can fire other objects at Grif's face?!

  • The "Fire Condom" PSA in all of its glory.

    Simmons: You may be asking yourself: what is burn? If y'all're asking that, it's because y'all're an idiot. You'll probably ask things similar "What am the sky?" and "How does consume food?" Even cavemen knew what fire was, you dumbass.

  • "What I Did On My Summer Vacation.": Caboose gets caught up in the Halo: Achieve entrada. Naturally, Hilarity Ensues.
    • When Caboose and Jorge are blasting into space.

      Caboose: Man, I can't wait to touch all of these buttons.
      Jorge: Don't bear upon any buttons.
      Caboose: ...Touch.
      Jorge: (Ejected into space) Cabooooose~!

    • In Dr. Halsey's introductory cutscene:

      Dr Halsey: Do y'all have it? (referring to the packet)
      Caboose: No, you won't permit get.
      Dr Halsey: Say the words please.
      Caboose: The words please.
      Jun: ...What...?

    • Him jumping over a tiny loma:

    Caboose: And then how did I lose all my fingers? Explanation This afterward became the name of an achievement!

    • When Caboose gets dropped off back at Blood Gulch from orbit.

      Caboose: Goodbye! Cheers for the ride! Yous are my new best friends and I will never forget you! Y'all probably tin can't hear me though considering everyone knows there's no oxygen on a rollercoaster! I am yelling quieter now considering I am further away from y'all!

  • The Blood Gulch Crew plays Firefight.
    • A bonus is that Doc is reunited with Omega for his scene.
    • Pretty much everything Church does.
    • Likewise Caboose.
  • Donut's Prototype Song "Donut: The Musical" will never not exist funny.
  • The "Higgs Bozo" PSA has Sarge's thought of a scientific demonstration, followed by Caboose going on a lengthy and somewhat eloquent speech about the nature of knowledge, closing with the thought that "People will always look upwardly at the sky, and just wonder why we're here". Then he shouts "H2o BISON POWERS Actuate!" and runs off at super speed. Simmons and Sarge's reactions, both to the speech communication and Caboose's exit, seal the deal.

    Caboose: Yeah, the universe certain is mysterious. But, you lot know, what if we did solve all the problems? What then? Would we but live on, forever, happy in our triumph over ignorance? Or is ignorance only a common enemy that, once destroyed, would leave our species without a reason to carry on? I guess information technology doesn't actually matter what the reply is, considering even if we could attain supreme knowledge, the thought of it but wouldn't go along usa together. In the cease, people will always look up at the sky, and just wonder why we're here. Water BISON POWERS, Activate!

  • From the "Online Survival" PSA, there's Church and Sarge discussing how to deal with Cyberspace Trolls, with a Ruby and Blue Battle Creek Zealot each playing the role of a troll. Only hearing Sarge saying this is hilarious:

    Sarge: (trying not to retaliate) Frowny emoticon...!

  • During the PSA's released to denote Halo 4'south release date, Sarge and the Reds are trying to go along the release engagement secret from the Dejection so they won't know to pre-club. The camera then cuts to Tucker and Church, who and then casually reveal that they already knew the release appointment and have pre-ordered. Also, Sarge'southward vocal about the date so that they call up.
    • If the videos themselves aren't enough, in that location'southward the sheer absurdity of seeing information technology dubbed in Japanese.
  • The "Go, Go, Gadgets" PSA, providing a satire against how new seeming gadgets get replaced by even newer ones.

    [BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ]
    Simmons: Ah, Jesus!
    Church: What's that noise?!
    Simmons: It's my cellphone. Donut must have borrowed it. He's ever overclocking the vibrate setting and calling himself.
    Church: invoked Gross...

  • The "Voting Fever" PSA. it's a Call-Back to their Halo iv announcement date videos, with Grif and Simmons trying to fox Sarge into thinking they were out to vote. Sarge forces them to do a pro-voting musical number; with a chorus of ODSTs joining in and Grif having no inkling near how elections work. To elevation it all off, it's revealed Sarge used the song as a lark to steal their place in line to buy Halo 4. And information technology turns out the 2 of them really did get sick. note To become out of piece of work and grab Halo 4, Grif and Simmons had to get a sick twenty-four hours for Nov 6th.
  • York'southward Image Song "Come up On Carolina", where he complains she'south "ever being such a bowwow" and asks if she could "please cease kicking me", and suggests "playing Halo four naked" and "having babies with light-green eyes".
  • During a live event, the RT crew did a live table read for the then upcoming 'MIA' miniseries. While the regulars were doing the assorted voices (with Burnie doing Vic), they had a pair of audition members doing 'naration' and 'sound effects'. At one point, when Vic is dialing the phone, the audio effects guy made the touch tone sounds play Mary Had a Footling Lamb.

    Gus: Hey, don't steal the spotlight.
    Audio effects guy <bows to the crowd>

    • Once Matt realizes Sarge will talk to Doc, he repeatedly tries to make someone else take Sarge's part. Also, at the terminate of the 'phone call', 'Vic' ab libs that Sarge and Physician audio alike. 'Sarge' replies that they don't, but why doesn't he call up Church building, or even Lopez.
    • Once, information technology strays off the script, then 'Simmons' has to note 'Sarge' cutting him off before.
  • The "Lucifer Breaking" PSA with Tucker and Simmons giving advice on how to get a date/to get laid. Funny overall, with a invitee appearance of Sister, information technology ends with a Warthog driven by Carolina, with Grey and Kimball, running Tucker downwardly.

    Tucker: Lavernius Tucker, dearest md extraordinHURGWAAauh
    Carolina: Nobody here had a problem with that, correct?
    Kimball: Not at all.
    Dr. Grey: Nope!

    • Prior to this, Simmons runs off after a engagement he'd stood up because she'd sent him a ;) emoticon, which was "getting as well serious". She shows upwards again— after having spent the night with Tucker working the rebound.
    • Prior to that, Tucker approaches a woman at a order.

      Tucker: [narrating] You can and so make your presence known past delivering a well idea-out and rehearsed selection upward line. Such every bit...
      Tucker: [shouting over the loud music] HEY HOT STUFF! NICE LEGS! WHAT Fourth dimension DO THEY OPEN? So WE Can—
      [She shoots him in the face]
      Tucker: OHHHH, THAT'Southward GONNA LEAVE A HORRIFIC SCAR!

  • From the "Getting Abroad from information technology All" PSA:
    • Sarge and Caboose go camping ground. Information technology goes almost as well as you'd expect. Except that they become camping in Minecraft.
    • Grif'southward and Simmons' trip to the Vegas Quadrant doesn't get so well either.

    Airport Security: Yeah, that's a cavity search.
    Grif: Aw, shit.

  • In the commentary for Relocated, Burnie Burns states flat-out that if a joke is funny plenty, the continuity gets temporarily suspended so it can be used, in the detail case the "Sister falling through the ice" joke.
  • Blood-red vs. Blue Blockbuster Trailer
  • The live-action "Sleeper" skit features Sarge, Caboose, and Grif in cryogenic stasis beingness awoken by a nameless scientist type (as played by Burnie Burns). Not merely is it hilarious to really encounter everyone in Spartan armor Head Bobbing similar in the games, but Grif treats cryosleep similar regular sleep, including installing a snooze push button on his tube's alert and begging off for "v more minutes" when Sarge tries to wake him. When the scientist notes that the taste of cryofluid should keep him from going back to sleep, Grif reveals that he "got bubble mucilage flavor" and a cut to the scientist's Information Pad reveals that he really has flooded his tube with bubble gum flavored cyrogenic fluid. Everyone else plainly got "scrotum flavour."
  • Simmons interrupting the "The Sound of Stupid" PSA virtually ASMR (only in time to cover up Caboose removing his helmet) with an Anonymous-style warning. He and then leaks all of their personal files to each other, including his ain. He gets tackled past Tucker and Grif after they feign sympathy for him and walk off-screen to find him inside the base under the pretense of giving him a hug.
    • Caboose wanting to function-play as a dragon and book-ending the video by asking if they were still going to do that.
    • The content that Simmons leaks is ridiculous:
      • Tucker'due south Slash Fic collection about himself.
      • Nude pictures of Sister, much to Grif's embarrassment.
      • A screenplay for a Sarge motion picture sequel written past Simmons himself, though Simmons didn't hateful to leak that.
      • A nude picture of Donut, though not leaked past Simmons, just by Donut himself unsurprisingly.
  • One bonus video proported to show that before Nathan Zellner was cast as the alien in Claret Gulch Chronicles, they had the other cast members audition for the role. The result was a video of the diverse VAs doing information technology in character of their roles.

    Caboose: I AM AN Alien!

  • From their Season 6 outtakes. "Butts" by Burnie Burns.
  • After Season 14, Rooster Teeth put out a short not-machinima video using a 360 setup. It'southward pretty elementary, with Grif and Simmons talking on top of their base, with Grif going over what he thinks would be the perfect way of robbing somebody: Wearing a clown mask and escaping in a hot air balloon. Meanwhile, if y'all take advantage of the 360 arrangement, you tin can plough the camera effectually, and while the guys are talking, the Blues are in the base stealing the Cerise Ground forces flag with Grif and Simmons beingness utterly clueless to what's going on.
  • The next 360 video involves the teams dividing the contents of a supply transport that "crashed" in Blood Gulch (i.eastward. it was shot down by the Reds). This includes the viewer (probably the ship'due south unfortunate airplane pilot, who also doesn't survive the next two minutes).
  • The third 360 video is about Tucker, Caboose, Church and eventually Sarge trying to teach Junior about sex. We could try to list the funny moments but every moment is a funny one.

    Church: Kill it with fire.

    Tucker: What?! No style! He can't die a virgin! That's Simmons' chore!

    Church: Mind, he'due south clearly inherited your perverted Dna-

    Junior: Bow chicka honk-honk.

    Church building: -Combine that with the species need to parasitically infect a host, and information technology means that all of us are pretty soon gonna be carrying mutant alien babies. (Sarcastic) Thanks, Tucker!

  • The 4th 360 video is from Caboose's perspective. The result is hearing Church suddenly talk about friendship at the drop of a hat and Sarge having a pirate accent. Non too mention the drawings that keep popping up.
  • This interview has Jack Lee answering in character as the Chairman saying he'southward not evil, just misunderstood - everyone else is in stitches, even equally genocide is brought up. Another highlight is Yomary Cruz channeling F.I.50.S.Southward. answering "I'chiliad sad, I'thou not able to reveal that information".
  • "Caboose's Guide To Finding Your Abode", equally if the one about making friends in Season 14 wasn't enough...
  • And at present we take "Lopez'southward Guide to Technical Empathy", which shows the viewer just how much crap Lopez has to put up with because of the Teams' clueless tomfoolery. It turns out to be one massive guilt trip towards Grif to make him speak more than Spanish. It doesn't work.
    • There'due south also Lopez stating that the reply to "Y'all ever wonder why nosotros're here?" is "To eventually be replaced past robots."
  • In the "Unreal Estate" PSA, Sister is now a real estate agent, selling only the best homes on World... which has gone to shit thanks to climate change. Arizona is a Lethal Lava Land, Florida is underwater, the Pacific Northwest is a desolate wasteland, and the Canadian forests are populated by white supremacists.
    • Sister's stance on greenhouses.
    • Canada wasn't happy with white supremacists moving into their forests, merely they're Canadian, and thus also prissy to actually do anything virtually it.
    • The solution? Sell the expiry homes to the white supremacists.

    Simmons: I think we just figured out how to make the Globe a better place once again!
    Sister: I'll get start making some calls!
    Grif: Endeavour selling them on lava house first. Those dickheads love burning shit!

  • In "A Trip Abroad", the Reds and Caboose show how y'all should act while traveling. It's a miracle they're allowed anywhere. Of grade, information technology starts with Donut being upset when he finds out nobody noticed he was on holiday for a few weeks.

    Donut: I talked about it for months! Y'all helped me get tickets to the Louvre!
    Grif: That doesn't sound like me... at all.
    Donut: Simmons collection me to the airport!
    Simmons: Uh, information technology doesn't ring a bell.
    Donut: Oh my gosh. Y'all guys were supposed feed my true cat! Whiskers!

    • And near the terminate of the episode, nosotros run across Donut's memorial to his dead true cat.

      Donut: At least I have all this French cheese to comfort me. (trigger-happy up) It smells terrible!

  • The "Hard Truths" PSA. Here, Sarge spells out some difficult truths for all of u.s.a. (namely, that mushrooms are inherently delicious and crabs deserve an apology from nature for having to crawl everywhere). But it turns out that the rest of the Blood Gulch Crew lured him up onto the podium so they could do a "friend-tervention" (which is not a roast). Highlights include:
    • Sarge changed the notification tone on Donut's phone to the "ping" of a live hand grenade.
    • Sarge also coined the term "active bowwow face" for Carolina.
    • Equally usual, Sarge has no idea what Lopez is saying. Which is ironically the thing that Lopez is lament nearly.

    Lopez: (I am in Hell, and he is the Devil.)
    Sarge: No hablo el spanish-o!

    • His recommendations to Washington for improving the quality of the show include Sarge getting a leather jacket, marrying a stripper, dreaming that a mad scientist has stolen his "coolness"...basically, as Launder himself puts information technology, reruns of Happy Days with Sarge in the role of The Fonz.
      • Appropriately, said list includes Sarge jumping a shark.
    • Simmons steps upward to the podium, only for Sarge to tell him to sit down back down earlier he tin can say anything.
    • And so Grif takes the stand. Let'due south simply quote this one word-for-word, shall we?

    Grif: He is the worst matter about my life.

    Grif: I wish him specific harm. Like a k years of Groundhog Day, simply for a looping menstruation of 20 seconds.

    Sarge: Ha ha! Grab 22! Whatsoever Hell without yous is a Heaven!

    Grif: You lot know what? I give up. My eyes were bigger thank my fucks on this one. (sighs) he won't change.

    • Cue Caboose taking the stand...and, well, Cloudcuckoolander that he is, he can simply think of nice things to say about Sarge.
    • And hilariously, this pisses Sarge off because he thinks Caboose doesn't know the get-go thing well-nigh him. He goes on to listing several of his own personal flaws, including:
      • Chewing with his mouth open up. Intentionally.
      • An irrational fear of pleated pants.
      • Loving guns he doesn't actually ain (he leases them).
      • Being totally non-functional as a civilian because the military is all that he knows.
      • Oh, and he hates mushrooms. This last admission is what makes Sarge finally break down crying.
  • In this video, Sarge is explaining that Season xvi volition only exist available on Roosterteeth.com, with other characters acting out eventual complaints from fans:

    Jax: So, this video's on Youtube, simply the new episodes aren't on Youtube?
    Sarge: Yes, Jax, anybody understands what irony is!

    • And while even so on the topic of irony, Flavor xvi was eventually uploaded to YouTube in promotion for Season 17.
  • Carolina (and afterwards, Sarge) promote RTX 2018. Seeing her imitate an echo, fangirl over Troy Baker, and complain nigh Sarge landing an airship while she'due south speaking shows that she'due south now as dorky equally the Reds and Blues.
  • "Recyling", where along with the usual weird lines ("Flabbergasting, my every flabber, gasted!") information technology Crosses the Line Twice when discussing recycling expressionless extras.
    • And so Caboose reveals he doesn't exactly know what a "recycling plant" is.

      Caboose: I've been burying this stuff for years, but ane'southward never grown!

    • According to Grif, yous should never recycle cans or bottles, because it would be a reminder of how much you drink.
  • And now we go into "Diversity", starting with Grif's Imagine Spot;

    Grif: Just imagine how lame it would be if everyone was the same!
    (cutting to four Simmonses)
    Simmons one: Hey guys, I tin can't discover my retainer, can I infringe someone else's?
    Simmons 2: Eugh, talk about unhygienic.
    Simmons 3: Oh, C'mon, we all have the exact aforementioned oral cavity germs.
    Simmons 2: Dude, I don't want your stuff in my rima oris!
    Simmons 4: Ooh, who wants to organize their sock drawer by size and colour?
    Simmonses: I do! Jinx! Double-jinx! Rutabega! Chinchilla subcontract! (Beat) My milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard / and they're similar—
    (hard cutting dorsum to Grif)
    Grif: (horrified) Oh, dear God, no!!
    Simmons: Grif, what'due south wrong with you?
    Grif: Pitiful, distressing... I but had a waking nightmare. Delight continue, singular Simmons.

    • Carolina is called a "feminista" past Grif, which initially annoys her. When he tries to sum information technology up as "Yous have boobs!" and she punches him, she then decides that "feminista" actually sounds pretty cool.
    • The Running Gag of increasingly baroque-sounding Malapropers that Caboose comes up with when looking for his missing pet chinchilla Benedict Cumberbatch.
    • Donut is called "fabulous."
    • How does Washington fit into the diversity angle Grif and Simmons are talking most? He's the angry white male.

      Wash: (motions to the gun he's property) What, this?

    • And and so, later briefly mistaking "variety" for "adversity", Sarge accepts anybody... every bit equally feasible targets to shoot at with a mounted turret.

    Simmons: Manner to go, sir! Technically that makes you one of the most open-minded people here!

    Carolina: That's not how it works, yous suck upward! (starts firing at Sarge) Swallow MY FEMINISTA Calendar!!

  • "New Holidays", where the Reds and Blues are celebrating a serial of new holidays to replace the more "tiresome" regular holidays. Including "Saint Peppy's Day" where they honour a distant relative of Saint Patrick by having Caboose release alive snakes on to their base, much to Grif'south displeasure. note According to Irish folklore, the real Saint Patrick was said to accept banished all the snakes from Ireland.
    • Carolina interim as The Comically Serious throughout the whole thing.
    • "Cinco de Macho" sees Sarge trying to goad Carolina into striking him. She eventually gets so pissed off, she leaves the scene... only to come dorsum in a Warthog and run him over.
    • The Long List of new holidays Simmons shows off before starting to shill products relating to them:

      December Fool's Solar day, Groundhog Twenty-four hour period, New Fear's Twenty-four hours, Chinese New Fears, Groundhog Twenty-four hour period, XXX-Mas (xviii+ ONLY), Brother From Another Female parent's 24-hour interval, Roboween, ROM Kippur, Groundhog Twenty-four hour period, Rhode Island Appreciation Twenty-four hour period, Earf Mean solar day, Mardi Gross, Dependence Twenty-four hours, Kevin, Transmission Labor Day, Dia de los Huevos, MILK Jr. Mean solar day, Cyber Monday, Uncle'due south Day

    • Information technology's shortly revealed that Simmons was hired past a greeting card company to promote the new holidays so that they could sell more than trade:

    Sarge: My God, son! How much is a human being's soul worth?

    Carolina: (Beat) Oh, that is just sad...

    Tucker: Concord up, you promised me a hundred bucks to help you with this holiday B.S.

    Sarge: Yous promised me a hundred smackers besides!

    Caboose: I get to proceed the snakes!

    Simmons: I never said I was a master negotiator.

    • Carolina so gives An Aesop nearly how holidays are not near buying things but spending time with family and friends, or honoring the achievements of great people throughout history.

    Sarge: Unless you lot hate your family.

    Carolina: Well, yep. In that case yous stay far away.

    Carolina: No, correct. Screw that guy. He was the wooooorst!

  • Pretty much the entirety of the "Cultural Appreciation" PSA.
    • The PSA hits a snag right out of the gate due to Grif, realizing the PSA pertains to going to a museum, flatout walking off set, forcing a restart of filming, with Donut subbing in.
    • Tucker is tricked into going to the museum by being told he's going to the Almanac Ice Cream and Monster Truck Convention.
    • "FUCK ART, I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"
    • Concerning ownership tickets to the museum, Donut promises, for those wishing to simply sneak into the museum, "a future PSA well-nigh lying to the police force is in the works."
    • As it happens, Sarge was willingly at the museum to teach Caboose nearly historical battles and warfare... only to realize the main exhibition at the museum that day was "Serene Flower Gardens of New England in the Late Romantic Period."
    • Caboose gets a student discount, because he's a Harvard graduate. Simmons is rightfully shocked.

      Caboose: Eh. It was my backup schoolhouse.

    • Tucker is reprimanded by Simmons for yelling in the museum... since, as Simmons states, "this isn't a library".
    • In the heart of discussing a painting about the fall of Icarus, Sarge slips into a flashback (completely with Deliberate Monochrome) of a soldier he saw die tragically... due to heat stroke.

      Soldier: (groan) Avenge me, Sarge... Impale the Sun. (Hurk, bleagh!)

    • Sarge then reacts in kind:

      Sarge: Stupid source of renewable energy! (punches the painting) Take that you lot stupid star!

      (cutting to outside)

      Simmons: And finally, when you get kicked out of the museum for violently punching one of the paintings, always make sure y'all have a fill-in plan for the residual of the twenty-four hours.

      (cut to a wider shot, showing Caboose and Donut standing by a huddled Sarge)

      Donut: C'monday, Sarge. Let'south get you a healthy dose of flashback-resolving water ice cream!

    • Tucker refuses to leave the museum, having grown a bond to information technology (due to the nude fine art). Simmons has Sarge and Donut drag him into the motorcar by his legs.
  • "Laundry Day", featuring loads of fun with Halo models. Culminating in everyone dressed every bit Caboose!
    • And Caboose is dressed in his quondam armor. Equally in, his Combat Evolved model.
    • Grif mentions that Color-Coded for Your Convenience is the only fashion to tell anyone autonomously, going totally meta when he lampshades how everyone seems to accept the same peak and body shape.
  • "Spice It Upward!". In which Sarge and Grif talk over how to keep their "reluctantly immortal" series interesting. In that location's when they propose calculation to the cast...

    (Lopez and Simmons are against Caboose)
    Simmons: (bored) Uh, nosotros're here you take your flag, you filthy Blue.
    Cherry Zealot: Yeah, you filthy Blues! Give united states of america your flag!
    Simmons: (looks at Red Zealot in surprise) Wait, what?
    Blue Zealot: You'll never get our flag, filthy Reds!
    Simmons: Huh?
    Blue Zealot: (shoots Lopez) Take that! Fuckin' bot!
    Lopez: (Why?)
    Simmons: Who are you people?!

  • "The Price Bike of Cash!", or Caboose hosts a game evidence. It really must be seen to be believed.
    • When introducing the contestants...

    Caboose: Now, Lopez, we actually had a meaningful chat backstage, and it sounds similar you're playing today for your sick sister. (Audition goes "Aw")

    Lopez: (What? I don't have a sister.)

    Caboose: Incorrect! (An off-screen shooter blasts Lopez)

  • "Visit the Dr.!", in which Sarge and Physician give advice on going to the md. As in, not an incompetent medic like Doc or a Mad Scientist similar Dr. Grey, but an office with bodily medical professionals. Suffice to say, they are all repeatedly horrified past how the Blood Gulch Crew should logically be dead by now.
    • The dismissive front desk-bound lady gets a lot less apathetic when Grif tells her most how his organs were replaced with Simmons' and Simmons' organs were replaced with robot parts.

    Front end Desk Lady: Oh my God...is that-?
    Grif: Canon? Oh, yeah.

    • The results of Grif's medical exam: Perfect blood pressure level, a cholesterol level high enough to clog a toilet, his blood is 50% marinara sauce, his knees are dust, his os density is ii%, and he has type 7 diabetes. The MRI guy tells him that his suit'south life support is the only reason he'south still alive.

    Grif: Sounds similar you're saying I'chiliad immortal! That is proficient news!
    Doctor: Uh, that is definitely not what I'm-
    Grif: Simmons, did you hear that!? I'yard immortal! I'm gonna live forever!

    • When Sister tried to get a urine sample, it diameter a hole in the flooring. And the results of her STD exam causes the printer to die of syphilis.
    • Caboose's reflex test: Every fourth dimension the doctor taps his leg, he doesn't react, merely a automobile turns on/off, culminating in all the toilets in the infirmary flushing at once.
  • "Moving Out", in which Grif and Simmons bargain with the realities of existence their own men.
    • Simmons buys a house in a seedy neighborhood. Information technology's run down, side by side to a dump, and the neighbors are in a car hunt with the police. What causes him to lose his nerve? Daughter Scouts knocking on his door and asking for cookie sales.
    • Grif buys a mansion that only and so happens to be near a fault line. He loses his nervus when he realizes that Simmons isn't effectually to clean upwards afterwards him.
    • The mansion is also congenital on the side of a cliff, with a "glass bottom pool" positioned over the edge. Caboose eagerly jumps in... and keeps falling. Turns out there is no bottom.
    • Sarge quickly suffers from Empty Nest one time Grif, Simmons, and Lopez are gone.
  • "Cyber Insecurities", where Simmons locks himself alone in Cherry Base and uses all sorts of things to prevent his ain teammates from entering for security's sake. Sarge breaks in... by blowing the place!
  • "Snowed In", where Doc shows how to survive a blizzard and Hilarity Ensues.
    • Offset, Sarge doesn't believe it's going to snow at all... even during the snowstorm.
    • Sarge believes that the but things you lot need to survive dangerous weather is milk, bread, gasoline, and a active nuclear warhead with a hairpin trigger. Guess what happens when Caboose gets about it at the episode's climax?
    • Because Caboose muffed prepping Blue Base for the snowstorm (equally in, he made a giant snowman encompass the whole base of operations), both teams cease upwards sharing Red Base. Sarge isn't happy with it, and merely when Physician is assuring him that he sent out a memo instructing the Blues to keep their hands to themselves...
    • To stave off boredom, Simmons leads the Blues and Doctor in playing "Canyons and Cockbites." Kaikaina'due south character is a "hussy," Caboose is a Hvac Repair Technician (WHAT IS THIS GAME...! "Oh, it's really high in charisma."), Simmons is an "Dragonborn Orc Barbarian Sorcerer," and Dr. is a dentist.
    • The inexplicable return of Church building! Who so gets trapped outside when Caboose fires the warhead and dies notwithstanding again. Furthermore, no one finds his appearance equally annihilation out of the ordinary bated from Sarge, who thinks he's a Cabin Fever-induced hallucination.
    • When Sarge starts going nuts from Cabin Fever, he rolls out a tank and begins to fire at the base doors. All Grif cares about is that the tank is blocking the TV.
  • "End Preppers", in which the Crimson Squad prepares for the apocalypse. Lopez is, of course, on the Terminator's side.
    • Simmons'due south weapon against the robot insurgence? Dial-upward cyberspace.

      Contrasted Lopezes: [Malfunction in Castilian]

      • If that doesn't work, Simmons hopes that his cyborg parts will be enough for the robots to accept him.

      Lopez: No es probable. (Non likely.)

    • Grif's weapon against the robot insurgence? Living at the waterpark. The Lopezes gun him down while he tries to taunt them from his "chlorine shield".
    • Sarge's weapon is to launch "emps" into the atmosphere... which causes a retaliatory nuclear strike from the robots, wiping out both human civilization and the robot overlords. Lopez is quite upset when Sarge repairs him to act every bit a helper.

      Lopez: Tu eres el demonio rojo y esto es mi infierno. (You are the red devil and this is my hell.)

    • When the giant radiations monsters attack, Sarge turns Grif, Lopez, and Caboose into giant robots to gainsay them. Caboose befriends the monsters, which Lopez proceeds to impale, causing Caboose to become on a binge. Grif leaves after Sarge decides to cause a 2nd nuclear armageddon, and Lopez leaves to re-enslave humanity.
  • Amateur Voice Actors, which equally expected, is Cocky-Deprecation at its finest. It even shows the show's own bandage flubbing their lines at the cease...
  • Sarge and Grif being used to announce Halo in Fortnite.
    • The continuation has Sarge and Grif existence forced to work with Agent 1 and Raymond to make Red Base look good for the Primary Chief's inflow.
    • Then, when Master Chief makes his Big Archway...

    Raymond: Uh...and then who'south team is he on?
    Grif and Sarge: Dibs!
    Ane: Dibs- Ah, dammit!

  • Someone decided to exercise a Ruddy vs. Blue version of the RWBY shipsheet for the sake of information technology, and it'due south a thing of wonder and dazzler, filled to the skirt with both puns and Genius Bonuses.
  • On the Blood-red Vs. Blue YouTube channel (at present re-branded every bit Rooster Teeth Animation), earlier episodes would end with ane of the Reds and Blues asking the viewer to subscribe to the channel...in their typically goofy fashion.

    Simmons: Greetings swain spider web surfers! Be certain to subscribe earlier yous go. It'll be but similar we're friends! Not that I... need friends... (nervous laughter) Delight don't become.
    Caboose: ...Where am I? (sees the SUBSCRIBE/Scout Adjacent EPISODE text) Well, that looks overnice! (turns to the viewer) Oh my god! A giant person! (ducks away in fear)

  • Out of Shatter Squad'south plugs to The Matrix Resurrections, the funniest one is One and East imitating Neo and Smith'south subway fight to see who'd get the last donut. But for Raymond to announced and catch it.

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Source: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/RedVsBlue

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